All posts by Canna Campbell

Shared with love, for your growing inspiration....from SugarMamma.

For Love And Money

Adam H. Kol, J.D. is a Financial Relationship Coach and Certified Mediator. He helps couples tackle the emotional side of financial stress.

What happens to “personal” finance when you add another person? As you may know, it can get tense, sticky, and complicated! So, I’m sharing the 7-step roadmap my clients use to create financial peace and partnership.

1. Take a Breath: if this is hard or you’ve been avoiding it, that’s normal! You’re not alone, and there’s nothing wrong with you or your relationship. It’s a big issue…but it’s solvable!

2. Set a Date: choose a time to get the conversation started. Feeling fear at this stage is common. If you need to, ask via text. Here’s a sample: “I’d love for us to discuss our financial hopes and plans. I think that would strengthen our relationship and make us happier! When’s a good time to take an hour or two to start that process?”

3. Set the Stage: when the moment arrives, lay the groundwork for a healthy conversation. Get connected, maybe by hearing about each other’s days. Put away the devices. Have a glass of wine if that helps. Remember why you love your partner, and trust that something beautiful is on the other side of this.

4. Share, Share, Share: this may get uncomfortable, but keep moving through it! Help your partner feel safe to open up about their fears, concerns, or past hurts. Model this vulnerability yourself, and try to understand, rather than judge, your partner. To ease in, I recommend sharing about your family and personal history with money. Now’s also the time to divulge anything financial secrets, i.e. debts or bank accounts. Share your values, hopes, and dreams, too!

5. Create a Vision: put your collective hearts and heads together, and dream up a future you both will love. Consider anything with significant financial implications, like where to live; kids; career plans; and retirement.

6. Crunch the Numbers: now that you’ve got your vision, work backwards to see how to get there. Make an actionable plan, budget and all. It’s likely that everything won’t add up on your first crack — that’s fine. Keep playing with the numbers until you find something you’re both stoked about.

7. Execute Your Plan: the nitty gritty. Do whatever it takes to carry out your plan. Regular financial check-ins create accountability and the opportunity for needed conversations. By the way, don’t despair when things get off track — they will, and that’s okay! Your plan will ground you, and from there you can adjust over time. Leverage financial tools to help. And continue educating yourself on key topics, i.e. debt, taxes, passive income, etc.

Your relationship will transform once you’re working together for a future you both love. Imagine — what would that be like?

Now, go make it happen! As you do, know that this is a huge step that many couples never take, so my Bonus Step is to Celebrate Your Successes!

Thanks for reading. Look out for future content on topics like what to do when one partner earns or spends way more than the other.

 

~Adam

 

10 Day Manifesting Magic Challenge

Since starting THE $UGAR TRIBE, I have been blown away by the passion, commitment and success of the tribe members with their financial goals. One area that we have really focused on is our money mindset and being open, understanding and respectful to the flow of money in our lives. When you can do this, a shift happens. Keep reading, I explain more.

With so much interest around this topic, we have been working through James Goi’s book, “How To Attract Money Using Mind Power”. Now before you think I am turning into a nut case, this book has practical steps from teaching visualisation, language skills and explaining the power of attitude and appreciation.

Half way during the book we decided to test out what we have learnt so far and create a $100 10 Day Challenge where we had to apply the lessons and see if we could create opportunities to save, earn or create $100 within the 10 Day period. We just needed to invest our time and energy in applying the principals that we had been discussing.

Over the course of 10 days it was incredible what we each experienced.

First of all my partner asked to borrow my car for the day, (something he rarely does as he has his own car) so when I got in the car the next day I had a full tank of petrol, saving just over $100. Then a day later, I was asked to help a friend out with a business opportunity, the only issue was that she couldn’t afford to pay me but offered me a gift worth $600. Next I had to grab a bottle of champagne for a friend, as I walked into the bottle shop I opened up my Vintage Cellars app and discovered that I had a $100 credit. Then I was asked to do an extra job, earning another $100.

But it wasn’t just me experiencing this. Another tribe member discovered that on the day we started this challenge, her bank had overcharged her $100, after contacting the bank, they immediately refunded the $100 but also gave another $100 credit as an apology. Then another tribe member managed to trade her loyalty vouchers for other loyalty vouchers worth 3 times the value of her original vouchers, allowing herself to buy $600 worth of earrings for approximately $180. Then another tribe member decided to pack food for a 4 day road trip, which was not their original plan. They ended up saving $50 per day. Then another member’s parents randomly offered her some money as an early Christmas present. Whilst these are reasonable events, they all happened at the same time to all tribe members going the challenge. We all applied what we were learning together, it was incredible.

And I have to say, the money manifestation that I experienced aren’t things that happen to me on a regular basis. It was quite mind blowing, yet I am so grateful of this awareness.

If you would like to join THE $UGAR TRIBE, please let me know. You can quickly and easily catch up as all our Facebook sessions are recorded and available within the group via a closed group on Facebook. I speak twice a week and also share private VLOGs as well as fun financial challenges. For some people the cost of the membership is tax deductible and if you want to join, you can email Jessica@sassfinancial.com.au and she can organise your membership.

xCC